It’s the second day of being in bed, and I must admit: this pain has been narly.
As mentioned in previous writings, I have memories of enduring this as a little girl… It would be an all-nighter of crying out, watching Beauty & the Beast as my dad laid behind me on the couch, with his arms & legs wrapped around me, until I finally drifted off to a better place in my dreams.
THOSE were the days. Not because I was writhing in utter discomfort, but because I lived with my family & had love all around me at any moment it was needed.
Now, at 29, I live independently & for the most part, take care of myself. Sure, I’ll ask the stranger on the cereal aisle to hand me Reese’s Puffs, because let’s face it, when you stand 4-feet tall, you can’t exactly reach the top shelf. Other than the occasional act of kindness though, I do my life & do it well.
But when the pain is this intense, I thank God for having love just a phone call / text away.
Yesterday my sister stopped in to clean my carpets (previously scheduled), she ALSO brought chicken & sweet tea, & helped get Netflix going. There is NO ONE I’d rather have than my sister, Ashley. She is hilarious. And says truth in the most knee-slapping ways. My heart lifts as she cracks jokes, laughter is exactly what I need in this valley.
Today, phone calls from friends, co-workers, family, are pouring in – all wanting to know what they can do to see me through this. Dr.Chamarthi was among the callers & listed ideas to help calm the inflammed nerve & lectured me to STOP the ibuprofen because of my one lone kidney – you can’t blame her, she’s a Nephrologist. But when we hung up I realized, there are other women with Spina bifida going through this exact same thing… & they may not have this same support.
So instead of telling you how hard this has been, I want to only say, God is full of grace. He loves us in our pains & through our relationships. He stays by our sides even in the valleys brought upon us – not by choice – but for our good.
& now, I’m about to text the first man who loved me & request his presence today. I’m hungry & still hurting, unashamed to ask for help & thanking God I have help to ask for.
So, He called before I even had the chance…
lucky. blessed. undeserving.
I love you all so much, keep praying & thanks for loving me.